You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
the day after is always just damage control
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
