I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize
