But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize
