i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Randomize
