Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
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