Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
