y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was wearing a shirt that said "Just Do Me", holding a half of a bottle of Vodka, and was screaming at her friends "PUSSY JUST SWALLOW!" before she chugged the rest of the bottle.
Dude, if you don't take her, I will.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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