I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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