It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Randomize