in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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