you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
