You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
