So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I think i got beer on your cat.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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