I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
Randomize
