I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
PANTIES FOUND
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