adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
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