She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize