if you like me you must not know who I am
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize
