Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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