google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
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