is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
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She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
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Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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