My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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