So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Randomize
