Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Randomize
