he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Randomize
