Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Randomize
