Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Randomize
