we made out on top of his cat.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
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