I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
