Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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