I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
