god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize
