I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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