She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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