Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
sick fucks of a feather flock together
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
