You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
