The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
