Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
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