Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I believe in your delicious
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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