So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
