WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
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