the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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