Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
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