Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
