What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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