He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Randomize
