I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
Randomize