Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize
