Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
Randomize
