We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Randomize
