Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Randomize
