You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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