Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
